Hunting Forum

1 day a first grade teacher is reading THE THREE LITTLE PIGS to her class.She comes to the part where the first pig is trying to accumalate materials for his house.The first pig comes across a man with a whell barrow of straw.She read and the 1st pig asked if he could buy the straw from him to build his house.She pauses and asks the class, "What do you think the man said?" A little boy in the back raised his hand and said...,"I think he said ...HOLY CRAP...A TALKING PIG!" The teacher was unable to speak for 10 minutes. lol

An Irishman leaves a bar.

Yeah weeg like that would happen lmao.good short one , keep 'em coming.

The more participation the better people...thanx for all the views and im still trying....im having fun ..i hope everybody else is enjoying this as much as i am.

A study in Scotland showed that the kind of "male face" a woman finds attractivecan differ depending on where a woman is in her menstrual cycle.For instance, if she is post-menstrual she may be attracted to men with plain facial features.When pre-menstrual, she can be attracted to ,more feminine features in a man.If she is ovulating she is attractedto men withrugged,masculine features, and if menstruating she is more prone to be attracted to a man with a pair of scissors shoved into his temple.

A bride who got a little too drunk at her wedding reception was still determined to say a few words of thanks to the guests for all their presents. She stumbled through a short speech and then turned to point to the presents on display,Which included a coffee perculator."And finally", she said,"I do thank my new parents -in -law for giving us such a beautiful perky copulator." lmao

According to archaeologists, for millions of years neanderthal man was not fully erect.Thats pretty easy to understand considering how ugly neanderthal women were.

A young ,attractive woman thought she might have some fun with a stiff- looking military man at a cocktail party.So she walks over and askd him,"Major, when was the last time you had sex?".... "1956"was his reply."No wonder you look so uptight!"she exclaimed,"Major you need to get out more!" "Im not sure i understand you,"He answered,glancing at his watch........"Its only 2014 now."

A group of buddies go deer and black bear hunting. One buddy named Jack is only a few hundred yards hunting bear from a dude named Pete.The morning is pretty quiet, until Jack heres a gun shot in Petes direction.Jack waits 15 minutes and decides to go investigate.Jack walks the distance to where Pete should be.Jack sees Pete near the bait barrel with his pants around his ankles ,humping this dead ,huge black bear."HOLY CRAP," says Jack.."I cant wait to get back to camp and tell everybody else about this...hahahahahaha.Thats when Pete picks up up his rifle and racks another shell into the chamber and points it at Jack.Pete asks,"Have you ever humped a black bear?"....Jacks reply,"No but i always wanted too."















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If women with big breasts work at hooters, where do women with only one leg work?.......IHOP..

what do you call a gay bar with no bar stools?.. a fruit stand...lmao

A sign found by hunters near a hillbillies house: HUNT AT YOUR OWN RISK! PROSECUTORS WILL BE VIOLATED!

HMM..Any feed back is great...let me know how im doing...if i suck..tell me..im hoping this is a good thread

Im a corporal in the us running a motor pool at fort hood.when i get a call froma man ordering me to send a hummv.to him now! I replied"theres no way sir,all the hummers are at the change of comand ceremony...all i have left is general "fat assed johnsons hummer left."The man said on the phone,"son do you know who this is?"I replied no i dont."He said this is general Johnson."I answered ,"do you know who this is?""He said no i dont."Iresponded by saying,"bye bye fatass!" and hung up the phone....lol

As a private was at my guard post when an officer i knew came to the gate.The captain said his password and i replied mine...I asked the officer to approach so i could identify him.The captain was mad at me and yelled..what if i had said the wrong password private?" I replied, "I would have called the seargent of the post sir."He said,"What if i had tried to attack you and infiltrate this base?"I replied ,I would have called the seargent of the post ,sir."Now he was really mad and yelled ,"Well, what good would it do you to call the sargent of the post at that time?"In response i answered,"Sir i would call the sargent of the post to drag your dead ass off my post...lol

Your humor thread is fine. Everyone needs a little humor in their life.

thanks grandpops im relly trying...hope to add in more in few hours

woooo hooooo im hoping for more feed back today ...so far its all positive

...here we go......This little boy goes to his dad and ask,"dad,?..Whats the diffrence between potentially and realistically?"To which the father replies,"Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Robert Redford for a million dollars." "Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars." "Then ask your brother if he would sleep with Tom Cruise for a million dollars." The young boy goes and asks his mother,Would you sleep with Robert Redford for a million dollars?"Oh god, of course i would,he is so good looking!"He asks the same thing about sleeping with Brad Pitt to his sister.Sister repies,Hell yes, hes freakin fine!" The boy then asked his brother if he would sleep with Tom Cruise for a million dollars. The brother says,"Of course i would, who wouldnt for a million bucks!"...So he goes up to his dad and says,"I think i learned the diffrence between potentially and realistically."Well whats the diffrence?",Says the father. The boy replies,"POTENTIALLY were sitting on 3 million dollars...Realistically were living with 2{1}****s and a fag!"

....3 guys are fishing, when Fred gets up to get a beer and  , loses his balance, and falls out of the boat.Ed says, What should we do?" Bill says, "You better jump in after him, hes been in the water for awhile,he might need some help." So Ed jumps in,and after sometime ,he surfaces. He says,,"Help me get him in the boat!" They wrestle Fred back into the boat.Ed asks,"What do we do now, it doesnt look like hes breathing?"Bill says,"Give him mouth to mouth." Ed starts tp blow air into Freds mouth and says,"whoa,... I dont remember Fred  having such bad breath!"Bill respones,"Come to think of it...I dont think Fred was wearing a snowmobile suit either."